What I Help With
Caught Between Aging Parents and Kids
For One Hour, the Focus Is You
For one hour, somebody gets to care primarily about you.
If you are a caregiver, that can be a rare thing.
You may be caring for an aging parent, a disabled child, a spouse, another relative, or someone whose needs changed suddenly and completely rearranged your life. Sometimes people know caregiving is coming. Sometimes they get thrown into it overnight. Either way, it can take over far more of your time, energy, attention, and identity than you ever expected.
Therapy can be one place where the primary focus is you. I may ask about the person you are caring for because they are part of your life, but you are the person I am there to support.
You Can Tell Me
Caregivers can develop a kind of gallows humor because sometimes humor is one of the few things that gets you through an impossible day. You may have a story that made you laugh until you cried and then immediately wonder whether you are a terrible person for finding it funny.
You are not necessarily going to tell that story to the friend you occasionally meet for coffee, or the cashier you chat with while running yet another errand. They may not understand why it was funny, and they may not particularly want to hear the details.
You can tell me.
Sometimes you need somewhere you can say, “This was awful, and also this one part was hilarious,” without having to explain yourself. Humor does not mean you do not love the person you are caring for. Sometimes it is simply one of the ways human beings survive things that are incredibly hard.
The same is true of the messier stories. There may not be many people in your life who want to hear the details of bathing your parent, cleaning up a bodily mess, handling a medication problem, or navigating some bizarre thing that happened at three in the morning. But sometimes telling the story matters. It gets it out of your head. It gives another human being a chance to say, yes, that was hard. Yes, that was strange. Yes, you handled a lot.
Less Fancy Than It Sounds
Therapy may include practical problem-solving, emotional regulation, boundary work, self-compassion, communication, advocacy, or figuring out where even a small amount of rest might fit. But a lot of the work is less fancy than that.
Sometimes it is simply showing up every week and having someone listen to you. Someone who remembers what has been happening. Someone who notices how much you are carrying. Someone who reminds you that you are still a person outside the caregiving role.
And yes, this may sound a little hokey, but I mean it: when I have had the opportunity to support caregivers, I have felt deeply honored by it. I have also often been in awe of how much people were managing quietly, day after day, while still believing they were somehow not doing enough.
You Do Not Have to Earn It
You do not have to earn the right to care for yourself.
Even one hour spent paying attention to your own health, thoughts, fear, anger, grief, humor, and exhaustion matters. Taking care of yourself does not take something away from the person you love.
It helps keep you here too.
Flexible Places to Talk
Virtual sessions are available from anywhere in Texas and may fit between responsibilities more easily. In-home therapy around Killeen, Copperas Cove, and Temple can be considered when it is a good fit and getting away is difficult.
My Approach gives more context for the methods I draw on. Life Transitions may also fit when caregiving has changed your identity or raised questions about your own next season.
Letting Someone Else Handle the Calendar
Write to me with a little about who depends on you and what has become hardest to manage. I take care of scheduling personally and can discuss options that respect the realities of your week.
You can start with a free 15-minute introductory conversation before scheduling. For once, you do not have to arrive with every detail organized for everyone else.
How I Work